The 5 Love Languages Book Summary Part 2

Our second part of the 5 Love Languages Book Summary will discuss each Love Languages and learn some examples on how to express Love in that specific language.

Love Language #1: Words of Affirmation

Word of Affirmation is an act of Love that uses “words to build up the other person.”

Verbal compliments, or words of appreciation, are powerful communicators of love. They are best expressed in simple, straightforward statements of affirmation.

The 5 Love Languages, Gary Chapman

These are honest complements and kinds words that we say to our partner. The words will have an encouraging and inspiring effect. Some examples are:

  • You look great on that dress.
  • I really appreciate your washing the dishes tonight.
  • Thank you for spending time with me.
  • You should continue painting. You are good at it.

The words should be delivered sincerely and must be said in a soft and kind manner. There is a difference in saying “I love you” versus “I love you?”.

Love Language #2: Quality Time

Quality Time is an act of Love by giving your partner your undivided attention. Sitting together in front of a television is not necessarily having quality time. What matters most is the attention given to your partner.

Having Quality Time doesn’t have to mean going out on expensive dates or engaging in romantic getaways. Quality Time can simply involve having quality conversations and quality activities at home.

A central aspect of quality time is togetherness. I do not mean proximity…. Togetherness has to do with focused attention.

The 5 Love Languages, Gary Chapman

In having Quality Time, the activity being shared is not the main thing. What is important is the emotional connection being made and that you are spending focused time with each other. “The emphasis is on being together, doing things together, giving each other undivided attention.”

Love Language #3: Receiving Gifts

Receiving Gifts is an act of Love that involves giving. This act is very visible and is one of the easiest love language to learn and to express.

While giving gifts usually involves money, the monetary value of the gift is not essential. A gift can be a handwritten letter, a small souvenir from a trip, or a handmade project.

It doesn’t matter whether it costs money. What is important is that you thought of him.

The 5 Love Languages, Gary Chapman

When giving gifts, don’t wait for a special occasion. Surprise your partner with a gift at anytime of the year.

Love Language #4: Acts of Service

Acts of Service is an act of Love by doing things for your partner. This requires thought, planning, time, effort and energy. Actions such as cooking a meal, cleaning the room, changing the baby’s diaper, doing the groceries, running erands — they are all acts of service.

By acts of service, I mean doing things you know your spouse would like you to do. You seek to please her by serving her, to express your love for her by doing things for her.

The 5 Love Languages, Gary Chapman

This truly means that actions speak louder than words! In today’s society, there is a very thin line on what a husband should do in the house and what a wife should be doing. It is now acceptable that the husband and the wife switch roles. The husband can do household chores. The wife can find work and build her career. What is important is to meet the emotional needs of your partner on whatever roles they have agreed upon.

But a word of caution, the act of service must be given as a choice. It cannot be coerced. Being demanding to your partner or criticizing the act will have a negative effect. Instead, learn to make requests to each other instead of making demands.

Love Language #5: Physical Touch

The last love language is Physical Touch. Since we were babies, a touch has been an expression of love. As we grow older, Physical Touch can mean so much more to others.
Physical touch is not limited to sexual intercourse. Holding hands, kissing, and embracing are also ways of communicating love to your spouse.

The author mentions the common mistake that men often assume that their primary love language is Physical Touch since their desire for sexual intercourse is intense. However, the sexual desire might be just physically based. The desire for Physical Touch much be meeting an emotional need for it to be a primary love language. “If he does not enjoy physical touch at other times and in nonsexual ways, it may not be his love language at all.”

To recap the Five Love Langauges are:

  1. Words of Affirmation
  2. Quality Time
  3. Receiving Gifts
  4. Acts of Service
  5. Physical Touch

For the next part of our summary, we will discuss ways on how to discover our own Primary Love Language and that of our spouse.


The 5 Love Languages Book Summary
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4

The 5 Love Languages Book Summary Part 1

Gary Chapman’s book, The 5 Love Languages is among my favorite book about love and relationships. It’s a book I love to share with other couples.

The premise of the book is simple. Love can be expressed in several ways. Each person has his own way of giving and receiving Love, or what the author calls the Primary Love Language. By knowing our spouse’s Primary Love Language, we would be able to express Love that is best understood by them.

Learning the 5 Love Languages is not the ultimate secret for a happy marriage, but the book can strengthen relationships or mend those who struggle in their marriage.

We must be willing to learn our spouse’s primary love language if we are to be effective communicators of love.

The 5 Love Languages, Gary Chapman

After the Love has Gone

Many couples would wonder what happened to Love. Before their marriage, couples were so “in love” with each other. But that changed after getting married.

The problem is many couples think that the “in love” stage is the “real Love”. Being “in love” feels great and euphoric. Nothing else matters. They believe that what they feel for each other will last forever and they will live happily ever after. Just like in the movies.

But being “in love” is totally different from “real Love.” It is a temporary high. The author explains that True Love requires effort and discipline. True Love should be intentional. “In fact, true love cannot begin until the “in love” experience has run its course.”

Some researchers, among them psychiatrist M. Scott Peck and psychologist Dorothy Tennov, have concluded that the in-love experience should not be called “love” at all. Dr. Tennov coined the word limerance for the in-love experience in order to distinguish that experience from what she considers real love.

The 5 Love Languages, Gary Chapman

After years of counseling, Chapman has discovered that people express Love in five different ways. He calls them the 5 Love Languages. Chapman is convinced that once you identify and learn to speak your spouse’s primary love language, you have discovered the key to a long-lasting, loving marriage.

The 5 Love Languages are:

  1. Words of Affirmation
  2. Quality Time
  3. Receiving Gifts
  4. Acts of Service
  5. Physical Touch

In this book summary, we will learn each of the Love Languages and how to apply them for a long and lasting relationship with our love ones.


The 5 Love Languages Book Summary
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4

PSEI Stock Trading in 2019

I am back at being active with stock trading at the Philippine Stock Exchange. I have a trading acccount for more than 5 years and I made several hits and misses.

I have big regrets with the misses. In 2017, my portfolio was doing very well. However, I missed to sell them when the stock market went bottom early in 2018. So I was back to zero earnings when 2019 started.

This year, I decided to be more active in the stock market.

I am reading 2 good books for beginners. One is about short term trading and the other is about day trading.

So far, I think I know how to pick good stocks. My biggest weakness is how to make a profit before the stock crashes down.

The two books provided me with new tricks. I made new mistakes also. But those are just helping me learn how to trade better.

The rewards these past weeks have been very small. I hate to admit that what I am earning in the stock market is too small for the amount of time I am spending on it.

I wonder how others manage to earn several thousands in just one day.

Small wins, says the author. If done regularly, it will sum up to something big.

Not bad, Bad Bird

Bad Bird Umami Fried Chicken

The picture of their Umami Fried Chicken at Bad Bird looks inviting. It looks perfect. The breading is cooked to perfect brown. It must be very crispy and flavorful.

I ordered their 2 piece Umami Fried Chicken Plate. Spice level was Safe. I did not choose the Spicy and the Chemical options. It comes with a Sweet Potato Waffle on the sides. There are other side dishes available.

When my order was served, I was happy that it looks exactly like the ones in their pictures. Not many restaurants can be that consistent and accurate.

The Bad Bird Umami Fried Chicken was really crispy on the outside while being soft and juicy in the inside. If that reminds you of a TV commercial, that is because eating it reminds me of Jollibee’s Chicken Joy. The flavors are different though. I find Bad Bird’s Umami Fried Chicken less salty.

The Sweet Potato Waffle was good too. I am sure Gab would love it.

The price is a killer though. Their 2-pc Umami Fried Chicken with Sweet Potato Waffle is priced at 490. If I would ever have a craving for fried chicken, a 2-pc Chicken Joy will be a good alternative for half the price.

Bad Bird has other choices in their menu that will not taste like fast food. Their Lemon Salt Fried Chicken and Salmon Steak are worth coming back for.

More about Bad Bird at their website http://bitebadbird.com/

Gab at 8

Gab at KL Petronas Twin Towers

Gab is now 8 years old !!! What?!?! This has been a level-up year. It has been an exciting year while learning new things with Gab.

He insists he is no longer a baby. I agree he has grown a lot and has shown maturity. But sorry baby Gab, you are still our baby.

Here’s Gab at 8.

  • Gab weighs 20 kilos. He compares it with the allowable baggage for commercial flights.
  • Gab is 122 cm tall. He complains that his pants are now shorts. We have been buying new ones every year. He outgrows them quite fast lately.

Gab knows…

  • How to play the guitar. He plays it surprisingly well that we continued his guitar lessons with Teacher JM. If he keeps practicing daily, he will just get better and better.
  • How to swim. Not yet with the proper strokes but he can stay longer in the water now. He can glide and paddle for short distances. We will need another swim class to learn water safety.
  • Grade 3 Math. And it’s not the Grade 3 math I had when I was in Grade 3. Singapore Primary 3 can be tough to handle. It was challenging to teach Gab long multiplication and long division methods. But I’m glad we were able to get good marks in our IXL account.

Gab loves…

  • Cars! What else could be first on Gab’s list. It has been extra special lately that he was able to ride in a Maserati Granturismo! But the Nissan GT-R is his favorite. He said he will save for it so he can own one by 2032.
  • Travel. He looks forward to our next destination. This year we have plans for Taiwan again, then Bali and Singapore. He looks forward to our holidays again in Bacolod.
  • To walk. He tries to get more than 6,000 steps daily. If he can walk back home, he prefers to walk with a snack break in a park.
  • Staycations. He likes staying overnight at hotel rooms. He sleeps with whoever is in Manila and stays in a hotel. If there’s a pool, that is a big plus.
  • Astronomical Events. He can still recognize some constellations. He already watched a meteor shower and a lunar eclipse. Soon, he will watch a solar eclipse too.
  • Yoshi, Toad, Noddy, George, Carey… Those are characters from Mario and names of his stuffed toys. He brings one or two of his toys when we travel.

Gab hates…

  • Hello Kitty. I tease him a lot about Hello Kitty so he hates her. He doesn’t want to own anything with a Hello Kitty on it. But I kept Hello Kitty stickers to give Gab if he misbehaves. Hehehe…
  • Movies and TV shows. He prefers the short documentaries only or mini series. Movies makes him cry.

Gab’s favorite pastime.

  • Draw. He can draw all day about cars and maps.
  • Driving. He sits on a bed and pretends to be a driver of a taxi or bus. He will drive at 180 kph.
  • “Like Daddy”. He wears what I wear. He eats what I eat. He likes what I like.
  • Call Shaun. They have a video call whenever they are both awake. Gab is excited to meet Shaun personally on December.

Happy Birthday Gab.

Read other posts about Gab.

Gab’s Grand 2019 Plan

The first plan was simple: visit Singapore on December 2019 to watch the annular solar eclipse. But after a wonderful holiday experience in 2018, Gab wants to be in Bacolod again during December. This is how Gab’s Grand 2019 Plan started. It will be tiresome and expensive but this will teach Gab some life lessons he won’t forget.

Gab’s Plan

As early as 2017, we agreed to visit Singapore on December 26, 2019 to watch an annular solar eclipse. However, this means that we won’t be going back to Bacolod during the holidays. We already told our folks that we won’t be spending Christmas and New Year with them in 2019.

I am personally excited to watch another solar eclipse. I first witnessed a Partial Solar Eclipse last 1988 in Bacolod. The Annular Solar Eclipse on December 2019 is the closest and most accessible solar eclipse in the next 10 years or 20 years. There will be other solar eclipses every year but it will be far or unreachable. The next Total Solar Eclipse in the Philippines will be in 2042. Thus, watching the eclipse in Singapore this year makes sense to us.

However, after several Christmas gatherings, family parties and the New Year road trip last 2018, Gab had a change of heart. He also wants to be in Bacolod again during the next holidays.

I reminded him about our agreement to only be in Singapore this December. Going to both Bacolod and Singapore will be expensive and the travel will be exhausting.

He cried and told me that he wanted both. He slept with a heavy heart that night.

Nice Try Wise Guy

The next morning, he told me he has a plan. I wonder what he dreamed of last night.

He told me it was possible to be in Bacolod early in December. Then on December 25, we can take an evening flight to Singapore. We could arrive in Singapore early in the morning with enough time to catch the solar eclipse in the afternoon.

What a childish idea! He thinks like the trip from Bacolod to Singapore is as easy as a taxi ride. So I told him that his idea sounds good but it will be expensive. We only have the budget to go Singapore. We need additional budget for our trip to Bacolod.

I thought that will shut him up.

But Gab grinned and reminded me that I have plans to cut my coffee expenses for this year. I can use the money I will save to fund for our Bacolod trip. He knows how much I spend on coffee shops every month. He started computing how much I can save in a year. When he got the numbers, he told me that it will be enough to buy the plane tickets. He smiled and beamed with satisfaction.

I was the one who turned silent. His idea was not that childish after all. It was as if he had the whole night to think it thoroughly.

I just told him that I heard his plan and I have to think about it. Gab has made his move. Now it’s my turn.

Daddy’s Move

I expected Gab to whine, nag or have a tantrum. This is what I often do when I was his age. No wonder I never got what I was screaming for. But Gab acted differently. He showed some life skills I have encouraged him to have.

He is a problem solver. He understood the problem and offered a solution. It was even a two-step process since he figured out the schedules and how we can afford the expenses for additional Bacolod trip.

He is persistent. He knows what he wants and will find ways on how to get it. When I told him he might need to think of other ideas, he accepted the challenge and said yes.

He values relationships. This solar eclipse will be the closest one we can witness in the next 10 or 20 years. It is a rare phenomenon. But when I told him he might need to choose one, he chose to be in Bacolod. He wanted more to be with his lolos and lolas, titos and titas, cousins and friends. But, of course, Gab insists that he wanted both.

If I say no, Gab might lose these skills. He may no longer be confident in solving real life problems. He may be reluctant in pursuing audacious goals. He may think family is not that important.

I have to be careful of my decision.

What say you…

Quennie and I talked about Gab’s Plan. We agreed that it is best to follow Gab’s Plan but with conditions. After our research on the fares, airline routes, it was time to pass the decision to Gab.

I called Gab for the “talk”. I can see he was both excited and nervous.

First, I told thim that Quennie and I liked his plan. It was great that he came up with the plan and it is possible that we can both visit Bacolod and Singapore on December. I explained that while his orginal plan was not exactly perfect, Quennie and I did some research and looked at several options. We were able to modify his plan and found ways to make Gab’s Plan possible.

Second, we told Gab the main condition. He should help save his part of the additional cost to travel to Bacolod. I showed him how much he should save and the ways he can save for that amount. It’s a significant amount but it was attainable. We have some unneccesary expenses for Gab that he agreed we can remove or reduce. We offered activities were he can earn or get allowance from us. He even offered to put the money he received last Christmas for the trip.

Lastly, I explained that despite all the plans and the preparation, there might be some roadblocks and hindrances. It is possible that the flights get cancelled, or a bad weather will delay our departures. Worst of all, it could be very cloudy in Singapore that we can’t even see the eclipse happen. Sh*t happens, but I did not use this phrase on him.

At the end of our “talk”, Gab was beaming. He agreed to the plan and was excited to work on it. He started telling his lolos and lolas, titos and titas, cousins and friends that he can meet them again on December and still watch the eclipse.

This Year’s Lesson

This was a good oppurtunity for me to hand down some life lessons for Gab. This is something he can only learn from experience. No books or online tests can provide this kind of learning. I hope he will embrace the experience and be enriched by the lessons it can provide.

Find solutions. If there is a problem, there will be a solution. Instead of whining or complaining, it is better to think of ways to solve a problem. If you really want something, you can find ways to attain it.

Work together. Gab’s first plan was not perfect. But when we combined our ideas and did additional research, we were able to find a way to make the plan possible. The solution was a lot better with our combined effort.

Sacrifices are important. To get to the destination, he may need to let go some things. Part of the condition is he needs to remove one online account for IXL to save on monthly recurring fees. He also was willing to let go of old books and toys which can still be sold online.

Expect roadblocks. I gave scenarios that our journey may not be on a straight line. We are preparing him of the possible problems that can happen. Hopefully, he will be ready when these happen and continue to find solutions for them.

Ready, Set, Go

Gab’s 2019 Plan gave me a headache. But it was a good opportunity for Gab to learn these life lessons. I have learned from this experience too. I learned to be open-minded to his suggestions, and to be patient with his requests.

Looks like Gab’s 2019 plan is all set and ready for execution. Quennie and I are excited as he is. What scares me now is whatever grand plan he has in mind for 2020.

Two Chickpeas: Craving for Falafel near Greenbelt

Finally, I found this place! I have seen the Two Chickpeas signboard outside the Eton Parkview Makati since last year but I can’t find the exact entrance. At last, they had a new signboard beside main lobby of the building. I was able to locate the place.

Two Chickpeas is the falafel house by Green Bar. I love the salad bowls at Green Bar in Buendia, Makati. This made me curious to try out their falafel house near the Legazpi Park.

The place is just small and can seat less than 20 persons. The menu is very short so making an order was fast. I ordered for the Falafel Bowl. I get to have the basic set of 5 falafel balls and a choice of lettuce or rice. Then I can pick 5 toppings to go with it.

The photo on their menu helped me choose the toppings I would like to try. Two Chickpeas has some side dishes that you can add for an extra cost. I thought the pita would be nice to go with the hummus toppings, so I ordered extra.

My order was freshly made. I expected that it will take long to serve my food like the way they prepare it at Green Bar. But after less than 10 minutes, my falafel bowl and pita bread was ready.

The Falafel Bowl tasted good. I loved all the toppings. I wished they put more of the hummus and the quinoa. The falafel balls were cooked just right. It was well done on the outside, and soft and flavorful in the inside. The lettuce was fresh, green and crunchy.

For 290 pesos, I find it a bit pricey though. The pita bread was an extra 50 pesos.

Their location is very convenient for me, so I expect to be back here again. I would love to try their Seitan Gyro next time. Now, I have a healthy meal option whenever I am near Greenbelt.

Instagram: twochickpeasph
Facebook: Two Chickpeas

Back At Negative One

I just had my fitness assessment at the gym. I was not happy.

Most of the metrics were within the normal range. A few were out of range but they were near the borderline.

What made me sad was when I compared it with my fitness assessment last May 2018 when I first signed up for a gym membership.

My May 2018 numbers were better than the latest assessment. I had lower body fat. I had more muscle mass. I had a lower BMI. At first glance it means that I was better off before signing up at the gym than after 7 months of going to the gym. I just took two steps backward.

My body weight was lower though. My goal last year was to lose weight and the gym did help. I weighed 76 kilos last January 2018 but I am now around 73 kilos.

This year, the goal is to be more consistent. I blame my food trip in Bacolod last December for the increase in body fat and BMI. I lost control with all those food I ate in Bacolod. It was one party after another. It happens once a year so I felt I should make the most of it.

So it’s back at negative one. This year will be my fittest year ever. I just need to figure out how to resist Bacolod again on December.

Book Summaries 2019

Reading books can take days or weeks. These book summaries aims to help you read the books in just about 2-3 minutes per part. Each book are broken down into 5 parts. I hope these books helps you in the same way as it has helped me.

Writing these summaries helps me recall the key points of the book. It forces me to read regularly too and to make sure I understand what I am reading.

And to Gab, these summaries are for you. I read it ahead so you won’t have to read the whole book. It will save you time. But still, I encourage you to keep reading.

2019 Book Summaries

Happy Money Book Summary Part 5

Happy Money is different from other personal finance books. It talks about how to spend money instead of how to earn it.

Even a small amount of money can bring happiness. It depends on where and how you spend it.

Take a look again at the 5 Principles from the book Happy Money:

  1. Buy Experiences
  2. Make It a Treat
  3. Buy Time
  4. Pay Now, Consume Later
  5. Invest in Others

You may have accumulate plenty of material things and yet you don’t feel as happy as you expect yourself to be. Little changes in your spending might help bring that smile back.

Act Now

Apply what you have learned from the book Happy Money with these suggestions:

  1. Is this “Happy Money”? Before purchasing, ask yourself if your purchase will bring you more happiness. If not, then you reconsider your decision.
  2. Combine any of the five principles. The more principles used, the more happiness.
  3. Buy last year’s model. An older model is cheaper. While the difference in features may differ, the older model can provide similar amount of happiness as a newer model.
  4. Limit the supply and access to your favorite things. Make it a treat by cutting down on your frequent purchases. Save the money you should have spent instead. Saving money can also boost happiness.
  5. Review your big purchases. Look at your budget again. Typically, housing and transportation ranks on top although they don’t really increase our overall happiness. Consider reallocating your budget without sacrificing much happiness.
  6. Buy more free time. Hire someone else to clean the house. Take used clothes to the laundry shop. Order food to be delivered for a special dinner.
  7. Donate to a local charity. See the impact of your money by donating it to a charity institution that is smaller and closer to where you live.

Happy Money Book Summary 
Part 1 | Part 2 Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5