Pope Francis is getting some controversy about his comment on spanking children or corporal punishment. During a weekly general audience, Pope Francis says it is OK to smack children if their ‘dignity is maintained’. After that, child abuse experts are criticizing the pope’s statement and are asking the pope to reconsider his remarks.
Francis made the remarks during his weekly general audience, which was devoted to the role of fathers in the family.
Francis outlined the traits of a good father: one who forgives but is able to “correct with firmness” while not discouraging the child.
“One time, I heard a father in a meeting with married couples say ‘I sometimes have to smack my children a bit, but never in the face so as to not humiliate them’,” Francis said.
“How beautiful.” he added. “He knows the sense of dignity! He has to punish them but does it justly and moves on.”
To spank or Not to Spank
At home, Quennie and I are divided on the topic. Quennie gives it a big NO! While I am open to spanking children as a last resort to discipline. For the record, I have not spanked Gab to discipline him even if he misbehaves sometimes. I still don’t see the need. Talking works and I have discipline techniques that have been effective for Gab.
Many Christians believes that spanking has a biblical basis. Here are some quotations come from the King James Version (KJV) of the Bible:
- Prov 13:24: “He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes (diligently).”
- Prov 19:18: “Chasten thy son while there is hope, and let not thy soul spare for his crying.”
- Prov 22:15: “Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him.”
- Prov 23:13: “Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die.”
- Prov 23:14: “Thou shalt beat him with the rod, and shalt deliver his soul from hell (Shoel).”
- Prov 29:15: “The rod and reproof give wisdom: but a child left to himself bringeth his mother to shame.”
But recent scientific studies shows that corporal punishment is not effective and will have negative effects. The American Psychological Association supports “parents’ use of non-physical methods of disciplining children” and opposes “the use of severe or injurious physical punishment of any child.”
Many studies have shown that physical punishment — including spanking, hitting and other means of causing pain — can lead to increased aggression, antisocial behavior, physical injury and mental health problems for children.
But some researches also disagree. Robert Larzelere, PhD of Oklahoma State University says “most of the cited studies are correlational and don’t show a causal link between physical punishment and long-term negative effects for children.”
In a meta-analysis of 26 studies, Larzelere and a colleague found that “conditional spanking” is more effective than 10 of 13 alternative discipline techniques, including reasoning, removal of privileges and time out. Larzelere defines conditional spanking as a disciplinary technique for 2- to 6-year-old children in which parents use two open-handed swats on the buttocks only after the child has defied milder discipline such as time out.
If my butt can talk
I agree with Larzelere views. I had my share of spanking. But I did not end up being more aggressive or having mental health problems as the studies have concluded. That is probably why I am ok with spanking.
Looking back, it was my repetitive bad behavior that got me spanked. Spanking was more effective to discipline me at that time. I was getting hard-headed that other forms of discipline have been useless.
It’s my turn now
While spanking was effective for me, I have found new ways to discipline Gab. Like APA’s statement, there are non-physical methods of discipline.
There are non-physical methods to discipline that are as effective as spanking. I bought three books on toddler discipline and applied them to Gab when he was as young as 1-year-old. Some of the tips worked, while some did not. It was a matter of finding which one is the most effective.
Spanking children is still one of my options but I am aware that if I spank Gab, Quennie will spank me harder.
Daddy’s note: Quennie just showed me a clenched fist!!!
Here are the three books I bought from Amazon.com regarding toddler discipline.
